2015 was a rough year for me. But I learned a lot. I learned how to make my situation better by not relying on anyone but myself to make it better. I learned a lot about myself and what I’m capable of as well. I think that was extremely important. Now, here I am almost two months into 2016, and this year already looks to be my most promising and productive year yet! So what changed?
I decided what I wanted.
This seems like an obvious thing, but I’ve gone through most of my life completely lost because I was never committed to anything. It took me being miserable through my twenties before I realized what was making me miserable. I had no real goal. No direction. No purpose. I’m the type of person (as most people are) who really needs some type of “point B” I’m working towards. Deciding what I wanted gave me a destination in life and told me where to start. I knew I wanted to be successful at what I’m passionate about. So I started looking for new careers (and still am). But it also forced me to start looking at playing music like a business. If it’s not profitable for me in my life, its not worth doing. so how do I make that happen?
That’s where I started. It’s already changing everything.
I wanted to be healthier.
I also made the decision to consistently push myself to be healthy and productive in every day life. The best part about this is that when I feel out of control with the bigger picture, or when I’m not making as much progress towards my goals as I might like, The day to day routines keep me anchored in encouragement, contentment, and an over-all feeling of being in control of myself and my life. This is what the healthy version of me looks like, and I function best when I’m keeping up these routines. My ideal day is as follows:
- Wake up between 7am – 8am.
- Gym for an hour or so
- Take a shower
- Breakfast with light reading to wake brain up
- focused attention on booking gigs,promo, social presence, and other music related goals
- day job through afternoon and evening
- home for dinner
- an hour or so of unwinding
- reading till I fall asleep
If I had my way, this would be the general structure of every day for me. And I would be happier because of it.
I started saying no.
This one is extremely important. I waste the most time in my life when I get in the habit of saying yes to too many people, events, and random things in my life. Too many commitments, parties, gatherings, dinners, movies, and other casual social things can seriously distract you from the fact that you’re not doing anything with your life. I’ve started to notice that when I see a person at a bar every day, or at every party in town, they usually aren’t doing much of anything with their life. This may seem harsh, and I’m sorry if this is you. But being around you makes me also not want to do anything, which makes me want to die. So I’ll probably be saying no to you a lot in the future. It’s ok if you take it personally, it is kind of personal. I just can’t be filling my life with drinking and partying to distract myself from the reality that I’m not doing anything of meaning or purpose anymore.
Life can get a lot more plain and boring at first, but soon you realize that your life is feeling more cleaned up and organized, and you start to see more of your ideal personality qualities come out and begin to develop.
It was a choice of being numbingly happy for a moment today, or supremely satisfied long-term with my future. The older I get, the easier that choice is to make.
This post isn’t so much a “helpful” post, though I hope it does help some people, as much as it’s meant to be an update on what I’m learning about myself and life. I hope that it has served that purpose. I feel healthier now than I’ve ever felt. This fact alone has encouraged me to press on. Life will always be full of lemons. Good lemonade takes a bit of labor and patience. But life will never stop giving you lemons. What are you going to do about it?